Self improvement: attempt 2

In a massive fit of optimism I joined a weight loss program. I shall only post the results if they are good.

So far I had to fill in a questionnaire that included the question:

Only answer this if you are a woman: Are you pregnant? Y N

I was tempted, sorely tempted...I suspect if you were a man and answered it yes then they would be seeking to make money off you, or if you attempted to answer it you perhaps couldn't understand the program?

The program joining was part of my LSM (less slummy mummy) campaign. So far I have the hair and the good intentions. I am short the body, the clothes and the children. I am quite sure that non-slummy mummy's don't spend a fair percentage of their time dealing with my children. In fact yummy mummys probably only have to deal with the likes of #3, DVD king, and have a nanny to do that.

I am just aiming for less slummy, now what exactly is that smell and where is #4 in relation to it.

Later edit: Must go WW3 just broke out, #3 and #4 were fighting and one threw something at the computer screen and broke it..."it was him, it was him, he did it, it was him......" Silence as they realise mum hasn't come to adjudicate, she has come to punish. Two small boys are now in bed, very quiet. Actually too quiet, BRB.

Noises in the night...

I was fast asleep last night when I heard a loud crashing noise, it must have been loud because I was fast asleep and the noise woke me, and I could still hear it. I lay there in bed wondering what had woken me and staying very still. (You know monsters under the bed can't find you if you lie very still.) Quietly into the silence Homer whispered " What was that?"

Now I know that the noise was loud, it woke the sleeping giant. " I don't know." We lay there a bit longer. Did he think I was going to have a look? No fear, he man, he big hunter, he could go and get eaten by the monster under the bed, and more importantly he could get cold.

Eventually he sighed and left the bed, grumbling and moaning. I heard thumps and bangs, I heard the back door open, I heard some muffled swearing. I listened carefully for the sound of something trying to get him...." ********* cat!"

The noises returned to the bedroom. " What was it?" The cat was apparently knocking on the door to come in. She had climbed onto the screen door and was bouncing on it to attract attention. She is a small cat and how on earth she was making that much noise is a mystery. Perhaps she had got a local lion or tiger in to help her, which had quickly run off and hidden in the undergrowth when Homer appeared.

The cat is usually inside, except when out playing with #4, so I can imagine that she was extremely upset that she had accidently been locked out, but not as upset as Homer was at being woken to let her in.

Join smiley saturday here. ooh, and this appealed to my bad parent side.

I did a silly thing, I joined a weight loss challenge. Not that i don't need it, but now I'm going to have to do something about it!