Madonna says that now I have tried out "run...ning" and "tri....cep....dips" I should get my diet in order. Luckily this is Madonna my personal trainer, not Madonna the anorexic baby adopting streak of gristle. I don't think I'd last long on her regime before testing out the edibility of my keyboard.
No, my Madonna gives me easy targets. Week one was eat fruit. (Tick) Week two was eat fruit every day. (Tick) Week three was eat vegetables with every evening meal (Tick). Week four was eat vegetables every evening and fruit every day, not one or the other. (Oh, woops, tick) Week five has been stop eating chocolate, (actually, an easy tick, I don't eat chocolate, just don't tell her about the cheese.) Week six, she found out about the cheese...(sulky tick). Week seven, eat fish.
Now this is an easy one for me, I like fish but I am not world reknown for my ability to cook it. More for my ability to buy it deep-fried in batter. So, as I understand that this might not be what she means by "eat more fish" I went to my local fish market, of which there are at least three in easy reach of my house. (Line through another excuse there.) I've brought home some squid for salt and pepper squid (which ticks Homer's no bones box) They are cheaper to buy ready prepared than not, which confuses me, but saves me the bother of covering my kitchen in squid ink.
#3 "Whats that?"
#3 "What for?"
#3 " Oh yuck, #4, #4 she's bought slimy squids for tea and we've got to eat them raw or she'll spank us she said so #4 #4."
#3 "look at the slimy squids, they look like dead things yuckeeeeee"
#4 "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEUK we can't eat them slimy squid things they'll be all slimy and yuckeee. I'm ringing up the shops to tell them not to sell you slimy squid things"
So...slimy squid things for tea then....Can't see them being called that down at Gordon Ramsey's but hey ho, that's what they are in our house now.
Things I have Said To My Husband Today
2 years ago