Thursday, June 26, 2008 at work

Son #1 loves his job bending and shaping steel into the vast air conditioning ducts and vents you see in public buildings. He comes home at night covered in grime and sweat, exhausted with his labours.

After pausing only to eat anything that stands still long enough he just has time to fit in six solid hours on the playstation before falling into a deep and dreamless sleep, happy with his lot.

I ask him about work and get grunts and shrugs in return, but they seem like positive grunts and shrugs. Today on the way home he slumped asleep in the passenger seat and I asked the standard question, "So, what did you do today?" Grunt, shrug, snore.

No, today, I decided I wanted to know exactly what had he done. Well, apparently, yesterday one of his co-workers had done a fart so smelly that they had to evacuate the shed that they work in. Today #1 had got his revenge by going over to his co-workers station and dropping one in return, the older and wiser colleague had remarked that it was an amateur effort and son #1 had responded with a "Just wait".

They had to evacuate the building again. He was very proud of this, the evacuation had been for a longer time. On return to the shed his coworkers had welded a plaque for him. "Air**** fart league--- Son #1: 5 points, co-worker: nil". I can't wait for the update at the end of the season.

"Really," I said, " and did you do anything else today?"

"Oh yes," he said getting enthused with the story telling. "So and so keeps stealing my lighter that I use for the welder to light his cigarettes, so I fixed him good. "

"How did you do that then?"

"I set my lighter on full flame and broke the adjuster off. When he lit his cig it took BOTH his eyebrows off. It was cool. Everyone laughed at him."

"So, is it like that every day, did you do any work?"

"That was work."

This is why they have "Men at Work" signs. To warn people with heart problems that they may see men actually doing work and it may bring on a heart attack.


slh35661 said...

This sounds like the place my husband works. He had to ban farting because there were daily contests to see who could do the worst damage. My husband was grossed out, but one day they had a tour of the administrators come through just after one of these bombs had dropped. It was very bad timing. That was when the fart ban was instituted.

Eve Redstone said...

They're all the same from one side of the planet to the other.